Category: Welcome
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The Kenopause
https://www.watfordobserver.co.uk/news/23842562.male-menopause-symptoms-just-signs-ageing/
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Crazy
https://www.watfordobserver.co.uk/leisure/23720630.tale-world-crazy-golf-championships-hastings/
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Auditors
https://www.watfordobserver.co.uk/news/23691188.youtube-auditing-videos-highlight-lack-knowledge-laws/
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Dangerous dogs
https://www.watfordobserver.co.uk/news/23634379.dangerous-dogs-act-must-reviewed-urgently-attacks/
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Fat boy
Far from being a sadist, I have learnt to embrace abuse. Well, not ‘embrace’ per se, as it more of a lukewarm handshake, yet it is an incumbent I must befriend as I continue to wage war against the invisible foe: Wokeness. Until a few years ago, having been a columnist for varying publications for…
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A painful truth
It’s easy to see where a society has got it wrong using dubious statistics. I don’t believe the ‘increase in hate crime’ figures and the rhetoric often thrust upon us. The last few years have seen an apparent increase in ‘hate’ due, in the main, as to how the figures are recorded. Now, if you…
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Hitting the gym
It’s an us and them scenario: people who ‘enjoy’ the gym and the rest of us. I have joined and re-joined numerous times, usually when morbidly obese, in an attempt to psychologically fool myself into believing that walking on a treadmill for 90 seconds followed by ten minutes rowing in manic fashion and an hour…
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Caravanning
Caravanning Caravans have always been seen as a gauge of affluence for the middle-aged desperado. With carafashion of chinos, flip flops, white socks, a Cat’s Protection League T-shirt and bifocals, the caravanistas clog up the motorway slow lanes with their Lunars, Buccaneers and Vanmasters. Having holidayed in my youth four-up in a two-berth box on…
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Smell the coffee
Middle aged wind-ups up no 27: Coffee shops: Reasons: Staff describing themselves as ‘Baristas’ to make the career choice sound more sexy. The inability to spell, or pronounce, your name right’ despite repeating it three times, and spelling it twice. The prices: Its coffee, not liquid gold. The upselling of a miniscule slab of brownie,…
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Middle aged internet searches
Recently I was techless. The laptop I purchased from John Lewis 3 weeks earlier, had passed, via fatal touchpad failure, and the trusty Samsung Galaxy mobile had decided to follow suit a few days later. The phone froze, maybe in shock, as I browsed through a fine selection of coloured Hollister ripped jumpers amid a…
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Meat
In addition to yesterdays ‘tablet dispenser’, another sure fire confirmation as to you being officially ‘middle aged’ is taking ownership of one of these bad boys: The meat thermometer. Forget using your God given senses or the adage of ‘if it tastes cooked, its cooked’, now is techs turn to assist you in probing your…
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Middle aged hero!
https://metro.co.uk/2022/08/03/darrell-meekcom-terminally-ill-dad-cleared-of-mooning-speed-camera-17121224/?ito=facebook|social|metroukfacebook
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More clutter
Despite struggling to move due to the back, I have purchased a chainsaw type device which is due for delivery soon. ‘The wife’ is going to go mental. I am justifying this purchase as aspirational. It will aid my recovery by showing me the light at the end of injury tunnel, and will act as…
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Mid life crisis
It is the acceptable question for a man of my vintage, should we attempt anything that deviates even slightly from ‘the norm’. ‘Are you having a mid-life crisis?’ Inevitably I must concede that yes, quite possibly I am, and have been for nigh on a decade now.And so, I deemed it prudent to investigate to…
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Tea bags
Us middle agers love a ‘hack’. 6 months ago I read that tea bags improve the soil in your garden. I have therefore, religiously, been leaving my used tea bags in the flowerbeds.Spoiler: It doesnt work and leaves your garden looking like a shanty town.
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Binfluencer
For the Middle Aged, today is, for us, a big day: It’s bins out. There’s some pressure: Get it wrong and the systems unforgiving, man. My new favourite word is ‘binfluencer’ and I can only aspire to be one: Binfluencer: The person on a street who takes the lead in putting out the correct waste…
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Middle aged Lioness sniping
As I write tomorrows fish and chip paper in my back garden with a sore head, the day after the Lionesses roared to victory in last night’s Euro final. We rightly bask in the glow of a gutsy, stoic and characterful 2-1 win at Wembley, against a German team who had won an astonishing 8…
Middle Aged 